I remember the very day I told our former regional director about my ultimate career goal. It felt like I had made myself a walking target. With excitement and conviction, I said, “Secretary.” I aspired to be at the helm of our agency. But from that moment on, I could feel the shift as people began treating me differently.

When I joined the organization, I came in as a senior level hire. A newbie in rank but not in experience, I carried the burden of proving I deserved the position. It was not just about a title. It was about being seen, acknowledged, and respected.

A few years later, my bosses retired. I knew I had to step up, even if I had not been around as long as others. I understood that promotions are not handed out. They are earned. I never failed an assignment, and I knew I had the qualifications. But I also learned that being competent is not always enough. Office politics, seniority, unspoken biases, and the simple fact of not being someone’s favorite all played a part.

What hurt the most was not just the missed opportunities. It was how my dream slowly turned into a nightmare. And when I began to falter under the weight of it all, no one asked what was wrong. They just took it against me.

Worse, the people I once respected and looked up to seemed intent on pushing me further down. Rules were applied differently. Bureaucratic layers multiplied just for my requests. I felt over-regulated and singled out. They had what they wanted, titles and power. Why could they not let me be?

Rules were applied differently. Bureaucratic layers multiplied just for my requests. I felt over-regulated and singled out.

Then came my scholarship in Australia. A blessing, yes, but one that came with its own complications. It arrived at the right time and the wrong one. Instead of being celebrated, it was used against me. Despite everything I had accomplished, I was never promoted even after I returned. It was painful. I am only human, and I know my worth. But I had no one to turn to. The damage was done. Their silence said everything: You are the problem.

Today, I visited my former workplace. It hit differently. I saw familiar faces, smiling and happy to see me, proud of how far I have come. I do not want to go back, but I do miss the sense of belonging I once felt there. That community reminded me that I mattered. And while I am no longer be part of that world, I have realized something important: even in my current space, there are still a few who see my worth. And that is enough.

This reflection is my closure. I am done seeking justice because the world does not always work that way. Let them be. I hope one day, they learn the joy of lifting others up.

But through the trials, my time in Australia, the kindness of those who saw me, and even the cruelty of those who tried to break me, I have found myself.

The best feeling in the world is realizing you do not need to prove yourself anymore. Growth is quiet. It does not beg for validation. I used to be a people “pleaser”, letting others dictate my choices. But through the trials, my time in Australia, the kindness of those who saw me, and even the cruelty of those who tried to break me, I have found myself. I made waves for my country, made outstanding achievement. I remain determined to make a difference.

I have felt denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. I have been through all the stages. And now this is acceptance.

This is peace.